copyright © 2003 Tatiana Hamboyan

The girl strode across the plaza self-importantly. Today was the day her mother had finally let her wear her old clothes from the 70s. Why she had always wanted to wear these clothes from an era that was long over had always been a debated matter within her family. Her brother, Toby, thought that this was just another desperate attempt to appear "cool" in the eyes of society. Jane couldn't help snickering at that thought now. Who really cared what society thought of her? Everything that she wore today (short of her underwear, of course: Who would want to wear their mother's old underwear?) had belonged to her mother the day that she had finally grown up. Her father saw it as nothing more than his little girl playing dress up in Mommy's old clothes. From the way her mother talked about him, it should have surprised her that he didn't recognize the particular outfit she was wearing today. Yet when she had begged her mother this morning to let her wear this outfit, her dad and Toby had merely shared a good laugh together about how ridiculous she would look in it. Her mother had looked fairly surprised at Jane's mention of this outfit, but saw Jane's request for what it truly was: not a request to play dress up, or start the next "cool" fad, but a request for her mother to let her seek her own destiny, her own day to grow up.

Nearly everything in her mother's life today was a result of the day that she had worn that outfit. Her mother would never tell Jane all of the story of that day, but from what Jane could gather, that had been the day her mother had met her father. Jane was sure more had happened than her mother would let on, but that was all her mother had told her. Struck by the fact that, though it was a Saturday morning, no one was to be seen in the plaza, Jane continued to walk as though it were perfectly normal for her to be the only one out for a walk on the weekends. She didn't quite know where she was going, but she knew she had everything she needed to get there. Her mother's old pocketbook, gaudy as it was, hung loosely on her right forearm. She had had to polish it this morning before she'd left, as it had become rather dusty through 20 years of sitting in the attic. Though she was usually completely unconcerned with her attire, today was important. She couldn't have gone out with a white pocketbook that had been stained an awful gray-brown. The true miracle she had discovered this morning was that her mother's old shoes not only fit her perfectly, but also were in perfect condition. She hadn't had to do anything to fix those up at all. The dress she wore had come with a warning from her mother:

"Now, you must be very careful of this dress. I've never spilled anything on it for 30 years, and if you happen to spill something on it, you'll pay for the dry cleaning bill."

Her mother's warning was completely understandable. The dress had black and white thick vertical stripes on it and was, of course, made of polyester. Those two combinations would make the dress a nightmare to clean should anything happen to it.

The most important item she had with her today wasn't her mother's old clothing. When she had awoken this morning, she had felt a burning desire to go somewhere, to do something. She realized that she didn't want to be stuck in her life the way her mother seemed to be. She wanted to know what it was like to feel excitement, true excitement: the kind that would keep you up all night dancing to the music in your head. She doubted she would feel anything near that type of excitement if she just sat back and allowed her life to continue on as it was going. There was nothing truly wrong with her life; it was just dull. Every day was like every other day. She went to bed at night knowing what tomorrow would bring, knowing tomorrow would bring a day exactly like today, only with different food and clothing. Why should she want that forever? Today she had realized that she needed a change. She needed something to get herself interested in her life again, and she knew she had everything she needed to find whatever that something was. Jane had never underestimated herself. She knew exactly what her strengths were and had never felt a reason to doubt herself. This overwhelming confidence was what had made her question her mother about the clothing earlier today.

Normally when Jane had mentioned borrowing her mother’s old clothes, it had been for the very reasons Toby and her father assumed she had asked today. She had, ultimately, wanted somebody else's life. She had wanted to be the grown up woman her mother was, had wanted to be the coolest person in the world for a few months for doing something as simple as starting a new fad. Today she hadn't wanted anybody else's life but her own, and as she strode across the plaza she felt that today was going to be the day she got the life that was always destined to be hers.